Have you ever opened up a fashion magazine and looked at the upcoming trends and thought, “What the what is going on here?” Sometimes it seems like there is no rhyme or reason to fashion. It can be based on a whimsy of a popular designer or a painting from the 18th century. The point that I am trying to make is that fashion is not always well-thought-out.

Why then, when it comes to dressing ourselves, do some of us make it so thought out? Why can’t we dress ourselves on a whim? The short answer is that we can. However, I have discovered that sometimes we let our brains get in the way of making choices – including what to wear – that can stifle our real style.

For instance, if I’ve got an upcoming night on the town with my best girlfriends, my initial inclination may be to wear my off-the-shoulder vibrant pink dress to show off my summer tan. But as the date nears, my brain starts to ponder on the “what ifs”. “What if the dress is too bright? What if my shoulders aren’t toned enough? What if my strapless bra fails?” And so, I start talk myself out of it and go back to the safety of wearing black pants and a subtle colored blouse because it’s familiar, comfortable, and safe. I won’t have problems with a strapless bra, I won’t have to worry about whether or not the dress is too “loud” and I certainly won’t have to think about how toned my shoulders are (or aren’t). The longer I let my brain linger on it, the more it will work itself back to a safe zone.

One way to avoid being “safe” with your style is to de-prioritize it. The next time you need to get dressed up for anything (whether it’s work or going out with friends) don’t think about what you are going to wear until you need to get dressed. Then go with what you FEEL is calling to you from your wardrobe. I promise that whatever you choose in the moment, will make you feel more alive, happier and confident than any outfit that you spent days pre-planning.